Archive for Comedy News

Glenn Beck claims health care bill includes insurance for dogs

Posted in Actors. LOL., News, Politics, Science, Weird with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 13, 2009 by Otto

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“Do you know in the health care bill, we’re now offering insurance for dogs,” Beck said. “Do I need to say any more? If you are somebody who is like, ‘Well, I just, I’m struggling and we’re barely making ends meet,’ I’m not paying for your dog cardiologist!” Beck said. “Not gonna do it. I’m sorry, the dog goes nighty night.”

Politifact:
Included in the House bill is the creation of a Public Health Workforce Corps to address shortages in the public health workforce. The program would provide scholarships and education loan repayment assistance for public health professionals serving in areas of need. Veterinarians are included among those public health professionals.

“The rationale is that with mad cow disease, swine flu and other animal-borne diseases and issues, there is logic in helping to create more and better trained individuals to treat animal health,” said Vincent Morris, spokesman for the House Rules Committee

I guess Glenn Beck likes swine flu, mad cow, Avian Flu etc.

The thing is, while it is a masterful spin for such a slow adult, does it work? People love their dogs, sometimes more then their family members. Vet bills aren’t exactly cheap either. I asked my dog, Foxy, if she felt she deserved this “socialized medicine.” She simply stated “Single Payer or Bust!” and took a little poop on my nicest rug. She really hates Glenn Beck.

Sean Hannity admits John Stewart was right about bogus footage. (VIDEO)

Posted in Actors. LOL., Comedy, Entertainment, Events, Interviews, News, Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 12, 2009 by Otto

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Jon Stewart, or should I say his writers, totally caught Fox News trying to misinform their already misinformed viewers. Michelle Bachman (R etard) held an event in Washington DC, and while she was speaking to Hannity about it, footage of the 9/12 Rally was played with the tag “earlier” in the upper left corner of the screen. While Bachman (R eally nuts) estimated that 20,000-45,000 people attended the event, the Washington Post reported it was actually more like 10,000.



Well I guess when caught red-handed, Hannity had to admit the footage was false. However he said it was a mistake, and unintentional. Umm, yeah Sean, the only people that would believe that crap are the people that, well, watch your show.

Spike Jonze Smacks Kanye West (VIDEO)

Posted in Actors. LOL., Art, Comedy, Entertainment, Music, News with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 1, 2009 by Otto

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Sure it’s fake, but it is just as gratifying.

William Shatner Makes Palin’s Speech Into Poetry (VIDEO)

Posted in News with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 28, 2009 by Otto

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Is Sarah Palin secretly a beat poet? Do her words make little to no sense because she is so immersed in language and lyrics that she operates on a plane we cannot grasp? We sincerely doubt it, but that was the implication last night as William Shatner appeared on the “Tonight Show” and read Sarah’s resignation speech in his typical Shatner way, with all the lilting and soft drum beats we’ve come to expect. It was quite magical.

David Letterman = Awesome

Posted in Actors. LOL., Comedy, Entertainment, News, Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 13, 2009 by Otto

David Letterman is a comedian. He made some jokes. Sarah Palin broke out her false outrage once again and miscontrued Letterman’s comments to make him seem like a pedophile.

Unfortunately for her, the rest of the world is a wee bit smarter than hier and knew what he was referring too. The following clip, from the next nights show encapsulates Letterman’s brilliance in such a way, that anyone with a functional IQ could understand that comedy is just that. Watch and behold Dave eloquently explain what he meant to the nation.